So I’m not on about writing your notes on your thigh then wearing tights to your exam. Or conning your brother out of a full portion of Maccies because you’ve been picking from their chips the whole car ride home.

No no. I’m on about the real beef. The real god damn beef.





In case we’re not on the same page still, the blonde girl in the image above probably isn’t that guys sister, friend or mother.

Now, there’s no judging here guys … we’ll all be the cheater or the cheater-ee in a relationship at some point in our lives, I’m sure. Did that make sense? … Cheat, or be cheated on. That’s what I meant.

I know I’ve been both!

Yes, yes boo the bad guy (me) I’m a terrible person …

In my defense, I’d like to add that I was 16 and the “relationship” I was in had about as much depth as a wad of spit. Not even that. Anyhow, one day I was at a bus stop and I ended up accidentally-on-purpose snogging the boy who had really captured my teeny-tiny teenage heart, and then that was that.

I blame hormones.

Even though I had the mental capacity of a fish and knew as much about “relationships” back then as what I know about gardening now, that was still definite grounds for cheating.

Fyi, I know nothing about gardening.

However, I’ve also been cheated on, in my last and only proper relationship. It wasn’t very nice but, looking at the bigger picture, cheating was one of the smaller issues in that whole shenanigan.

hashtag. nutjob.

Obviously, I’m older and wiser now with a larger mental capacity than a fish or my 16-year-old self so, I can hand on heart say that I wouldn’t cheat. I just don’t see the point of being with someone if you’re a) likely to have a few bevs and fall on someone else’s penis or b) actively, soberly, consciously, go out of your way to crack on with multiple people.

Like, you blatantly should just stay single and live the bachelor life if that’s the case, nothing wrong with that. Less stress, you avoid hurting people’s feelings and you are ace-ing (at least in one department) not being a completely shitty human. Fantastic.


cheating (1)



But there’s the grey area isn’t there. What, actually, counts as cheating?

Full on insertion of penee? definitely on the cheat-o-metre.

 A “hey babe x” text at 3am … wellllll, who’s even sure?

Like where do you draw the line? Before liberty-taking and trust issues come into play?

In my mind. Anything you wouldn’t do INFRONT of your partner is probably grounds for cheating.

But that’s just me personally, because I know I am so chilled out and accepting that it’s borderline weird. So if the person I’m with is doing something I’m not okay with, then it’s probs safe to assume it’s scoring high on the cheat-o-metre.

Basically, I’m not the type to go cause WW3 over my bf liking some other girls Insta photo. I probably wouldn’t even notice, and frankly, I couldn’t care.

But what about you? I’m genuinely interested to hear other people’s opinions on this.

What do you think qualifies as cheating?

Flirty text messages? Secret meetings with a work colleague? Selfie liking? Drunken smooches? Or do you think you have to do the actual deed for it to count as fully-fledged cheating?

 Go on, set the record straight. Tell me. I want to know your thoughts and feelings about this (and I know you’ll have them) …

So get commenting and sharing your stories with me, guys & gals. Let’s put the world to rights.

Happy debating …


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  1. Coyote from Orion says:

    Deceptively hurting… and continuing to because they can. Usually the behavior of those who never learned consequences. Hideous when kids are affected. Egos without responsibility tend to see it as their right to have kids when the rest of the peer group does. A bit like living on a credit card.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Ema Brewer says:

      This is a very good point 😌 Honestly couldn’t agree more. I just don’t understand why, if that’s the way they’re going to treat someone, they’d stay with that person? Just hurts people and wastes their own time. Defo a whole different kettle of fish when kids are involved or people are married. Really disappointing to see! Thanks for your comment also and for passing by 🙂


      • Coyote from Orion says:

        What has always baffled me on this one is why someone would harm the person they supposedly care most about. Cowardly behavior. Get a blow up doll.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Ema Brewer says:

        I think when it goes past a certain point it becomes more than just being a general arsehole. Becomes a bit more sinister! Their loss anyways in the end, people like that will eventually run out of string!


      • Coyote from Orion says:

        True. Those behaviors are often connected to others. It is never simple. Evil has a holistic model too? I have seen some monsters in my life and career. Caught up with my mother yesterday and in our discussion talked about those like me who don’t have kids still have parenting roles in our society and we are always role models for other people’s kids in a good society.
        Corruption is weakness as in a piece of metal. Integrity. Funny thing is that children and animals often smell bullshit

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Ema Brewer says:

    Well, you’re gunna get them everywhere aren’t you. It’s a shame! Should always listen to your gut, or listen to other people who may be getting funny vibes and are trying to advise you. The animals and kids thing is well creepy, definite sixth sense of some sort.
    Yeh I agree, my ex was a horrible person but in a way I’m glad I experienced someone like him because I know what to avoid in the future!
    You and your mother talk a lot of sense!! 😘


  3. Gail says:

    Great writing Ema, glad to know your experience did nt scar you only made you stronger, gut sense is very powerful girl. You and I talk sense to and frequently while on the gin 🍸🍸and tonic, love your blogs ❤️💛💜💚💙


  4. Invisibly Me says:

    I love the #nutjob 😛
    This is such a tricky one, and I do see a difference between flirting and lust, and genuine feelings for someone, the latter being worse in my mind. I guess if I was with someone and they were sending sexy texts/messages, or was openly flirting in public, I’d say that was hurtful and I’d end up being super paranoid. A kiss or more would be cheating, but it’s a tough call because once you get a thought in your head and wonder whether he’s (or she’s) thinking about someone else it’s hard to get rid of it.x

    Liked by 1 person

    • Ema Brewer says:

      Ahaha nice touch 😉
      Tbh I kind of agree with you there. Physical stuff is definitely grounds for cheating but emotional stuff, although it’s really hurtful, is pretty grey area tbh!
      Honestly, I’ve learnt my lesson, always listen to your gut and as sooooon as you have the suspicion they’re cheating or lying about cheating then just leave because you’re probs right!
      Thanks for your lovely comment as always 🙂 xxxx

      Liked by 1 person

  5. cheatingspoues says:

    I can’t believe what just happened,he did it again,A professional hacker just provided me full access to my kids phone calls, text messages and their social media accounts which means i can now monitor their daily activities and also be able to know when they are being misled by anyone. I am happy about this because my kids mean the world to me.You can contact the brain behind the hack at murphy.c8990@gmail.com for any problems you have that relates to hacking


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